Crones Counsel

Crones Counsel (CronesCounsel.org) is a national organization “dedicated to claiming the archetype of Crone through the creation of gatherings that honour and advance the ageing woman’s value to society.” The Counsel has annual 4-day gatherings in different cities, usually in the western states. These attract women from all across the United States and Canada, with occasional attendees from overseas.

Crone of Puget Sound is not affiliated with the Counsel but any of our members may attend its annual gathering.

Gatherings are celebrational, educational and relational! The centerpiece is Morning Storytelling, where anyone who cares to may tell a piece of her story, and/or ask for a “standing ovation” for her life’s work. The afternoons feature workshops, both practical and playful. And the evenings are for play. The first evening is a mixer where people meet, greet and mingle. Another evening is for the Follies where anyone may perform in any way, gifting us with anything from the hilarious to the serious. Another evening is for the honoring of the elders, all attendees 80 and above. And finally, one evening is a banquet. Every evening after the scheduled event there is drumming and dancing! There is also the Crone Marketplace where artistic crones share their work.

Crones Counsel is a place and an atmosphere where old women are affirmed and younger women are mentored in vital, positive elderhood in order to become true crones. All are welcome.

Crones Counsel Newsletter, December 2021

Bowing to Mystery
Maggie Fenton
Winter Solstice is my favorite holy day. No other time of year makes me so aware that I’m a small animal on a big planet in an enormous universe. I love the symbolism of light coming out of the darkness. Looking out to the southwest from my kitchen window, some days I see the southern sun making long shadows in the still woods. Plants and animals (including humans) slow down, rest, and prepare for the light to return. The moon and stars are brilliant in clear night skies. Humans are not in control of this mystery. We can study it and gain a smidgen of understanding but bowing to the mystery seems totally appropriate at this time of year.

Dear Elsie

Lovely Crones! It’s that time of year again when many of us celebrate a special or sacred time. The days become shorter, second by second, as the month advances even though deep winter is not yet upon the land.

This is a season of contrasts. Solstice brings more light each day as temperatures drop and cold winds howl. We can be blinded by the sun one day then wrapped in fog or a blizzard the next. The media bombards us with images of happy families and jingle bells. Buy! Buy! Buy! it screams, while the next minute flashing a clip of hungry children in a free food line or someone huddled in a blanket on the sidewalk. At the same time, many will be joyfully observing traditions, enjoying beautiful lights, feasting, celebrating in a place of worship, or participating in family activities. The world of the internet makes it possible to share festivities with so many more far-flung friends and family than we ever could in person. Even if we are trying to cope with loneliness.

It’s a small wonder that some of us may be experiencing conflicted feelings. Let us practice kindness, my dears, both to ourselves and others.

This month’s question addresses an emotion familiar to most of us at one time or another.

Dear Elsie,

“I often feel like breaking things! I get so angry that I just want to smash something. It could be my husband (which is often the case), politics or crazy stuff happening in the world. This blind rage comes over me and I pick up the nearest thing and break it! My supply of drinking glasses and dishes is dwindling! Not to mention the mess to clean up. Please don’t recommend hitting pillows, it doesn’t do it!”

P.S. I am in therapy.

Yours truly,

Breaking things and bedlam

Dear Breaking things and bedlam,

As I’m sure you know, therapy helps but it’s a process. Anger isn’t, it’s a form of emotional self-protection that demands action. Punching a pillow is useless and often makes it worse. So does throwing unbreakable dishes that can bounce off the wall and hit you in the face. Some women keep a stash of thrift shop items if they have an easy to clean private space to use when only breaking something calms them.

Women are still conditioned not to express anger openly. You are not alone and here are a few things that have helped other women when the white-hot anger burns.

Elsie welcomes your questions.

Crones
Many of you will join us on December 18th for our Winter Zoom when we celebrate the Crone. Based on the book Crones Don’t Whine by Jean Shinoda Bolen, here are some qualities of “Crone.” Of course, you don’t have to possess them all to qualify but it’s worth thinking about how you fit the model.

(Thank you, Ruth Cohen)

  1. Crones don’t whine
  2. Crones are juicy
  3. Crones have green thumbs
  4. Crones trust what they know in their bones
  5. Crones meditate in their fashion
  6. Crones are fierce about what matters to them
  7. Crones choose the path with heart
  8. Crones speak the truth with compassion
  9. Crones listen to their bodies
  10. Crones improvise
  11. Crones don’t grovel
  12. Crones laugh together
  13. Crones savor the good in their lives and
  14. Crones are resilient. (Ruth’s addition!)

Ruth Cohen, Our Newest Member of The Mother Board
By Carol Friedrich

As the youngest member at age 66, Ruth says she is “learning from the older, wiser and more experienced Crones” with whom she now serves on the Crones Counsel Mother Board.

Her first Crones Counsel was in Salt Lake City in 2017. Having found her tribe, she has attended the two in-person gatherings since, and, then, graciously she volunteered to chair the 2020 gathering in Portland which, unfortunately, had to be canceled due to the pandemic. She is enthusiastic about Crones Counsel and, as a relatively new member, is able to look on the organization with new eyes, bringing energy and perspective to the Mother Board.

Poetry Corner
Giving It Away
By Pat Casner

I’ve got to use it up, spend it, give it all away
Everything I’ve got and have been given,
My talents, my gifts, my body, my mind,
All that’s been given to me in this life.

My time is running short, no one knows,
Time may be out, the end could be now.
Things must be done, completed, finished.

I can’t hoard, hold back, hold in what
must be given, shared, passed on.
I can’t waste this precious time.

Can I be brave, more courageous,
and do what I must do?
I must live fully, and use all that I have to give.

Pat holds a master’s degree in Holistic Health Education and Counseling, spent 37 years teaching Childbirth Education and birthing, is a certified hypnotherapist, and has had years with a private practice in psychotherapy.  She now lives in Malawi, Africa with her husband working in agriculture and teaching nutrition.

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